Ed lay on her back, hands folded behind her head. "You know," she began, voice languid, "I never thought I'd say this, but after twenty-eight of them, orgasms begin to get a little boring."

"Boring?" Roy pondered sounding offended but couldn't quite muster the steam. "I wouldn't say 'boring'. Not particularly climactic, perhaps-"

Snorting, Ed said, "If it's not a climactic climax, that's what I call boring. Anyway, I have to find a way to get my body back to normal."

"We," Roy corrected, yawning and stretching, "need to do that." She sat up and combed her hands through her hair. "This is all very nice, but I'm unlikely to rise in the ranks as a woman."

"God, you're an asshole," Ed muttered, rolling onto her side. "Why am I even in bed with you?"

Roy looked down at her, expression thoughtful. "You know," she suggested, lazily, "we really should go for thirty. Just to be able to say we did."

"Say to who?" Ed snorted. "I'm telling nobody about thi-"

She was interrupted by a loud hammering on the door. "Brother!" It was Al's voice, high and scared. "Brother, they said you were here, visiting the Colonel - Brother, I need help-!"

Ed flung herself out of bed and was running naked down the stairs without another word. Alarmed, Roy pulled on a housecoat, belting it quickly as she followed.

Al stumbled in the moment Ed opened the door, a cloak about the armoured form, gauntleded hands coming to her shoulders. "Brother, you wouldn't believe what-"

Voice trailing off, Al stared at her.

"Yeah, I know," Ed said gruffly. Roy noted with amusement that her hands rose to cover the hickeys on her neck rather than her breasts. "When I find out who did this..."

Al swallowed. "Then you know how terrible this is." Gaze lowered, Al dropped the cloak.

Roy's eyes widened. The changes were quite dramatic, with hip-plates added to the armour and high heels on the boots. Most dramatically of all was how his breastplate was now - well... a breastplate. Quite noticably a breastplate. The breastiest plate, Roy had to admit, that she'd ever seen.

"Holy fuck," Ed said, and she spoke for all of them.

Al sank down to her knees in the hall, gauntlets coming up to cover her helmet. "It's not fair!" she wailed. "I haven't even got to hit puberty and I'm now... now..."

"It's okay, Al," Ed whispered, wide-eyed with shock. "It's going to be okay-"

"I'm STACKED!" Al wailed.

Ed rocked her. "Shhh, Al, it's okay, shh-" She shot a glare up to the landing, and Roy bit her lip hard. "Are you laughing, you shit?"

"No," Roy lied smoothly. "Excuse me. I, uh - feminine problems," she said, and fled to the bedroom before Ed could kill her.